Many people’s life choices are shaped by high-stakes societal pressures to find “the one” and make them an emotional and financial partner, our lifeboat, our everything. Meanwhile, feelings of loneliness are at an all-time high and increases in cost of living and political divisions threaten too many of our safety and survival. What if we built a resilient constellation of loving relationships—which may or may not include a monogamous romantic partnership?

Sexuality and relationship educators Drs. L. Kris Gowen and Lauren Lichty challenge cultural norms around how we “do relationships”—platonic, sexual, romantic, and others—by bringing together the principles of relationship anarchy, trauma-informed approaches, mutual aid, and healthy relationship practices. Beyond the binary of monogamy and polyamory, they invite you to take a queer, feminist approach to all the close relationships and friendships in your life and build true communities of care.

Dr. L. Kris Gowen is a queer sexuality educator who has spoken nationally and internationally on the intersections of sex and technology. She has authored textbooks, teacher guides, and lesson plans to support inclusive school-based sexuality education.

Dr. Lauren F. Lichty (they/them) is a queer activist-educator who supports college students at the University of Washington learning about gender, sexuality, healthy relationships, and building strong, just communities. Lauren writes and speaks nationally and internationally about social justice teaching, participatory action research, cis heteronormativity, and ending gender-based violence.